


I Would Have Followed You

by orsoly_writes



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Episode: s01e01 Pilot, F/M, max's pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-10-19 02:07:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17592644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orsoly_writes/pseuds/orsoly_writes
Summary: Max’s inner thoughts from S01E01 after telling Liz who he really is.





	I Would Have Followed You

**Author's Note:**

> Hi dear readers,  
> This is my very first fic which isn’t about Malec (Shadowhunters). I have to say that it was kind of a challenge to write this, but I’m more than excited about your reactions.  
> I started to watch ‘Roswell, New Mexico’ last week and I have to tell you that I was hooked after 10 minutes—maybe because it gave me some Maysville vibes (anyone who’s read that story of mine might have an idea of what I’m talking about XD...small town, ten years, longing…)—and I still have chills from this specific scene from the show.  
> I have never read the books and have never seen the original show, so if I’m wrong with anything please forgive me. I do not own the characters.  
> Also, don’t forget you can find me on Twitter [here](https://twitter.com/orsoly_writes) if you want to share your thoughts or to simply fangirl over the show. ;-)  
> Even though I’ve tried to keep it as clean as possible, all the grammar mistakes are mine and mine only. Special thanks to Marie who checked this fic before posting.  
> Kudos, comments, and tweets are appreciated :)  
> Enjoy!  
> Lots of love,  
> Orsi

 

Liz turned around to face Max, looking back and forth between his eyes, the warm breeze blowing her long, dark brown hair.  
“Max...” Liz said, not breaking eye contact, making his heart beat faster than it already had been. “Why me?” She asked, her voice barely a whisper, and he just couldn’t keep his eyes on her. Glancing around, blinded by the setting sun for a couple of seconds he pushed the pictures of the bleeding, unconscious girl on the floor to the back of his mind which popped up in it unwittingly by that question.  

He was trying to find the right words. How could he explain it? Were there any right words to describe how he was feeling? He could come up with a lie, which wouldn’t be easy, but after sharing one of his darkest secrets with her, he thought that it just wouldn’t be fair not to tell her the reason why he had saved her life. He felt like he owed her a proper explanation. He needed to tell her the truth, he just didn’t know how to do it.

He had never thought it was going to be this difficult. He didn’t want to ruin anything between them, but he didn’t want to miss his chance either. 

He had had time. Ten years. A decade to be prepared for this moment. Would enough time ever pass for this? Was he ever going to be ready? 

Loneliness and longing had always been friends of his since she had left, he was used to it by now. Killing those lonely nights with strangers—and not so strangers—had helped, temporarily. But those women weren’t her, and at the end of the day, he had always ended up alone.    

And he had tried, he had really wanted to fall out of love. God, how he wished it could be  _ that _ easy. And the more he had wanted, the more it had hurt—love had only left him alone, there had been no point in trying anymore. There had been those weak moments when he had thought that he just couldn’t take missing her anymore and so he had ended up drinking—but there had never been anything strong enough that could have taken away his pain. 

He couldn’t just stop missing her, it was like he was bonded to her for a lifetime, carrying his unrequited love and his unsaid words as weight on his shoulders. Maybe this was his chance to unburden his heart, to unbend his mind, to… to move on. 

He had witnessed people falling in love around him while he had been nursing his aching heart with memories of Liz, her favorite song playing on the jukebox in her father’s diner. 

Max took a deep breath and looked into Liz’s eyes, “do you remember the first time we met?” He asked.

Liz pushed a mop of hair behind her ear. “I... I feel like I have just always known you.” 

“I remember it,” Max said and swallowed dry before he continued talking, “I can show you, but...” he stopped and licked his lips, trying to pull himself together, “I need to touch you,” he added and watched Liz waiting for a reaction.

“Okay,” she didn’t hesitate and answered immediately, “do, um…” she paused and swallowed before continuing, “do whatever you want,” she said, her eyes locked on him.

Max took a deep breath, feeling his heart drumming remarkably fast in his chest. He looked aside and licked his lips before he stepped forward and closed the distance between them.

He lifted his hands and pushed her jacket aside, from her shoulders down to her upper arms, slowly exposing the white sweater she was wearing. His eyes never left her face, examining every expression she made. He didn’t want to overstep the bounds if there were any.  

Max pushed aside the fabric of her sweater on her chest with shaky fingers. Nostalgic feelings and the sweetest memories were already filling his mind as he was trying to collect the thoughts he wanted to share with her.

He didn’t know why he was so nervous. Was it because he was about to confess his real feelings to Liz or because he needed to touch her to express himself the way he wanted to?

Max’s hand was hovering above Liz’s chest, her each breath heavier than the previous one, before placing his palm right over her heart.

Her lips parted when their skin touched, memories of their past flooding her mind.

The feelings that overtook his whole body were overwhelming in every way possible. He could feel her every heartbeat underneath her soft and warm skin against his palm. It was like everything went silent around them, his senses heightened, and he could only focus on her.

He remembered the first time they had met back when they were kids, when they were teenagers, and how much his feelings had developed towards her, getting stronger day by day. He remembered all the songs Liz had shown him and how the lyrics were now imprinted in his mind. 

He remembered the last couple of months before Liz had left Roswell. How his heart had ached knowing that he hadn’t confessed his feelings for her and how much he had wanted to follow her… but he just couldn’t have. There hadn’t been a single day since Liz had left where he hadn’t thought about her and the possibility of a future with her if there was one. There hadn’t passed a day without him regretting his decisions.

He had missed his moment ten years ago due to a series of events that had happened…he had been left there with his achingly bleeding heart in his chest.

Liz grabbed his wrist, gasping for air as he showed her another memory.

His love for her, that pure feeling that he had tried to get rid of during the last ten years of his life had only grown stronger. And he just couldn’t forget her, it was impossible.

Now, his hand was tingling as his feelings broke the surface and came out from that hidden place in the deepest parts of his heart. 

Liz opened her eyes, looking back and forth between Max’s.

“After high school...” Liz was battling for breath, “you would have followed me,” she added and Max could see the realization in her eyes.

“Yeah,” he admitted, pulling the jacket back on her shoulders, “anywhere,” he added, looking deep into her eyes.

Liz stepped closer, she glanced down to his lips then looked back into his eyes before she leaned in. Max closed his eyes as they touched their foreheads together, the tips of their noses brushing. 

His lips were barely an inch away from hers as he could feel her warm breath on his mouth.

It would have been the easiest thing to lean in and brush their lips together, he had been waiting so long for this to happen. His heart was screaming at him but his mind was telling him that this wasn’t the right moment. It wasn’t the right time. He knew that Liz’s action probably didn’t reflect her real feelings for him.

Max used every inch of his power to pull away, still feeling the ghost of Liz’s breath on his skin, making every nerve ending tingle in his body. Every piece of his broken heart was beating awfully fast. 

“Max, I thought...” Liz said, her voice barely a whisper. 

“No,” he shook his head lightly, looking away as he tried to pull himself together, “the handprint is a psychic bond between us. That’s how I can show you my memories. Right now, what you’re feeling is...” he explained, trying to hold back his tears and not choke on every word he said, “an echo of what I feel for you.” 

He paused and looked down. He didn’t know that saying it out loud was going to be even harder than the mere fact that it was the truth.  

“It’ll wear off, just like the handprint will,” he explained without looking at her and hoped that Liz was going to understand, “so... I can’t.”

“When will the handprint fade?” She asked.

“Couple days, maybe a week,” Max answered. 

“Fine,” her eyes dropped to his lips again, “I’ll kiss you then,” she said and his heart skipped a beat.   



End file.
